Being a mom.
It is a labor of love. It is all consuming, often thankless, and oh so monotonous.
I have always known that I wanted to be a mother, but before I had children, I really didn’t understand. I didn’t realize the immense amount of immediate love that I would feel for each of my children. It was and is so overwhelming. I didn’t realize the pressure I would feel, or just how it intimidating it would be to know that it is my responsibility to not only keep my tiny humans alive and healthy, but to teach them to be self sufficient and to make good choices. I didn’t understand the way that my heart would break when I would see their pain–especially when I was powerless to take it away. I also didn’t realize that an accomplishment on the part of my child would feel like a triumph for me too.
I didn’t understand what it would be like to live with my heart being carried outside of my body.
But I do now.
My three little people are my world. They are the source of my greatest joy and my greatest frustration, often at the same time. I truly want nothing more than to see them succeed in this life, and to see each of my children be happy and healthy.
I have a mother too.
Her name is Shelly. She is beautiful, and she is an example of everything I hope to be to my children.
She raised the three of us (my two younger brothers and myself) on a little farm by the mountains in Southern Alberta, Canada. Although I now understand just how much patience and effort it took to raise such a strong willed daughter (as I now have two of my own), she truly made it look easy. She was the type of mom who was just always there. She still is. Although my brothers and I occasionally tease her for “putting the mother in smother,” (in the best way) the fact is, I have never doubted for a second that my Mom would always be there for me.
I can’t count the number of times that she waited up for me and made sure that I was safely in bed before she let herself rest at night. I can’t count the times that she told me that I was beautiful and smart, and I believed her. I can’t count the times that I called her when I was a new mom, just so that I could keep my sanity. I can’t count the times that she has dropped everything in her life to come to help me through a transition in mine. I can’t count the times that she has cried tears for me, or has prayed for me with faith and the love that only a mother has to offer a struggling child. I can’t count the number of times she has fought through her own pain and struggles with her health to provide an act of service for one of her children.
Often, I am sure, she assumes that these acts of service and love seem to go unnoticed. But they aren’t. More than anything, I know that my beautiful mother loves me unconditionally.
And that is all I could ever hope for my children to know.
That I will always be there for them, and that I will always love them. No matter what.
I love you mom. ❤